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After seeing a number of stories shared with the collective community that ended with union and their happily ever after…

I thought I would share my own experience. It might be a little long, but I hope someone can learn something from it.

I had been single for a while following an incredibly rough karmic experience. I was cheated on, and (at the time) it had broken me. I questioned everything about my self-worth and completely distorted my view of other people.

I worried I would become bitter and distrustful of letting anyone close to me. I certainly met people who were in that position.

However, I reasoned with myself that learning not to trust someone would not be a useful takeaway. Sure, there are people out there who would abuse that trust. There were also those who would do magnificent things with it.

So, after dusting myself off, I started to put myself out there again. I started to trust again.

It was a rocky start.

There were a few mishaps but I noticed something had changed within me. Like a switch had flipped. It wasn’t one that made me distrustful or resentful… instead I had some kind of clarity of who I was, what I was worth and what I wanted.

For the first time I set new standards for the people I allowed in my life. I set new standards for what I would and would not accept.

After always looking for something exciting and someone that matched my kind of work and adventurous activities, I instead looked for the right kind of person.

I had never heard the term twin flame before, but I knew I was looking for someone special to me. Not just another person to ward away loneliness.

To respect their privacy, I’m going to glaze over some details here. We met and got on like a house on fire. Our first five dates all started with coffee and then spiraled from there. We would walk as slowly as we could at the end of the night to prolong our conversations.

I’m not normally the kind of person to bond with someone quickly like that. I usually take some time to allow feelings to develop, and I tend to date around for a while before making any decisions.

By our third date, I knew I was in trouble. They were more reserved than I am, but everything I saw was exactly what I was looking for, and there was just something there.

The weeks went on. We would meet and our text chains were constantly going but I’m sure you can see where this is going. I probably wouldn’t be here to share my story of things went smoothly from there.

By any of my previous standards, things were great. They were smart and funny enough to roll with even my most inane conversation. We would go on dates and there was all the signs we were both into each other.

But that still wasn’t enough for me.

I don’t know what it was. I’ve certainly let worse situations drag out for longer, but some dates started to become flaky, and I was always moving my schedule around to meet theirs.

In another time (what feels like another lifetime) I would have let that continue on. I would have told myself it was fine or that it would eventually change.

But I had these new standards for myself and those that I allowed in my life. So, I drew that line in the sand. I didn’t do it with the expectation that it would fix things or that they would change their actions.

I did it because it felt genuine to me.

Almost immediately, I got the response that, on some level, I knew was coming. They had questioned themselves why they hadn’t been able to make time for me, why they hadn’t made more of an effort.

They told me they didn’t have the emotional capacity to meet me where I was, and that was the end of it. They respected the line I’d drawn, and they walked away from it.

What was weird was, no part of me regretted what I had said. I was up front and respectful about it and it had severed a connection I appreciated. But I stood by it.

I wished them well and moved on with my life.

I won’t say it was easy. I felt the immediate loss of our communication, the excitement at seeing a message or making plans to meet. I felt the loss of the potential I saw together.

But I also wouldn’t have changed anything about the path that led me there and rather than fall into my previous self-destructive habits of going through a breakup I felt… motivated. I worked on myself and felt driven to work on areas of my life I had been ignoring.

I even went back to online dating and began to talk to new people within a few hours. It was still gut-wrenching, and nobody else seemed even remotely as interesting

I felt the loss, but I also felt… growth.

I didn’t understand what I had experienced at the time; I just knew it was important and my life was better for it.

That’s when the syncs seemed to start. Almost immediately just strange situations were presenting themselves that reminded me of the time we had spent together. I shrugged it off as just one of those things. I was seeing them because they were still on my mind.

I mostly resisted the urge to message again. I mostly resisted the urge to check on their social media, to read old messages or to check if they’d seen anything I posted. I left one final message to say if things change, they could always reach out to me.

When I was trying to explain this to a friend they just smiled and introduced me to this community. Things clicked into place. With understanding, came progress. I could put explanations to the things I was feeling.

I started following the blueprint. The more I understood and was able to let go of the parts of the journey that no longer served me, the easier I found it.

It was hard to explain. It wasn’t like I forgot them. It wasn’t like I gave up or abandoned them. It was more that the connection became sort of… background noise for the rest of my life. It was a constant factor but not a feature.

That push to improve myself continued. I traveled, I met friends, I improved my professional life, and I even started to date other people.

It’s hard to put into words. Part of my knew that I didn’t need to date anyone else. Part of me knew what I was heading for and that the incredible potential and unlikelihood that I would ever meet someone who matched me that well anywhere else.

But it was as if those thoughts were coming from outside myself.

The rational part of me still thought this was something that would pass and I should ‘get back out there’. The need to check their social media or our old messages faded. I didn’t forget. I just didn’t need to think about it.

This went on for about two months.

Then, one morning, it was like repeating an old routine from when we first met. I woke up and checked my phone, and there was a message from them like they used to be.

They always started their day several hours before I did and I used to start by replying to their message which would do us until lunch.

I’d like to keep the exact words private but there was no shock and awe. No jolt of excitement. It just… was. It felt normal. Natural. Like we had never stopped talking all this time.

Our texting resumed, we met two days later and we’ve not looked back since. Our first meeting had triggered something in both of us. A catalyst for change and growth in different ways, but it brought us to a place where we could move forward together.

Thank you for this. Thank you for all the help and advice. Thank you for this community. Thank you for reading my story.

Would you like to share your experience with the collective? You can submit your story here.

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