This twin flame story comes from Jeysa who also included this lovely message: I appreciate what you do so much and how much you have been such a great source of support throughout this journey. I wanted to share my story
I had been with – what I now know to be – my karmic partner for almost six years. We had a very strong connection but I recognize that we met each other where our wounds were, we unintentionally trauma bonded and brought out each other’s shadows without the tools to navigate them properly to grow and heal.
We had been stuck in a cycle of the same arguments for a long period of time. It evoked a false sense of closeness. He became emotionally unavailable and aggressive toward me, and I became addicted to finding moments of emotional connection with him whenever I could.
In our 6 years together, we moved in together, we had a child, we bought a house and we got engaged (in that order). When I think back on the engagement, I realized it felt like something was missing. It didn’t feel quite as fulfilling as I thought it would have.
I had been in many relationships before this one, and this had been the longest and most meaningful of them all. I understand now that this pattern of falling into relationships was a part of my soul journey to break karmic cycles which eventually led me to my twin flame.
My karmic and I got to a point where something clicked in me, which evoked the thought, “What are we doing? Why are we so stuck? Why do I feel so bad about myself?” He is the only person that ever made me feel like my blood was boiling and the only person ever to make me feel bad about myself or my character.
I know I’m a good soul with good intentions, and I have so much love to give – but he just had this way of changing my inner dialogue with myself.
We got to a breaking point before I was going away for a two-week retreat as part of a voice teacher training program. I had been in the program for a year leading up to that point, only having met the members of my cohort online in smaller groups to accommodate for Zoom.
There are only 12 of us but somehow I had only ever had one session where both my twin and I were present at the same time. It was brief, and we were in little boxes on the screen.
I told my karmic that I was going to use this time away to focus on my craft and to reflect on this relationship and how to move forward whether that be together or not. To take a moment to breathe because I hadn’t felt the ability to do that in a long time.
When I got to the retreat, it was so wonderful to be meeting all of these like-minded individuals, such bright lights each one of them. We all met each other with hugs. Of course, the last person I was to greet was my twin.
I felt this immediate, visceral, extremely intense feeling that coursed through my whole body when I saw him, and we hugged. I literally saw white all around him when I first saw him. We both had this kind of surprised expression on our faces like “how have I never seen you before?”
He felt so familiar to me. I moved around so much growing up and have met so many people in so many communities through what I do for work and I have never felt this type of encounter with anyone ever before.
I was shaken. I tried to avoid him as much as I could and would pair with other people in exercises we’d be doing as part of the training. But of course, in a group of 12, I was only able to avoid him for so long.
Our first one on one conversation was in a pond. We trod water for at least half an hour, getting to know each other a bit and I was shocked to learn how many synchronicities and similarities we had. Whenever we spoke one-on-one, it felt like time didn’t exist and that we were just so channeled into each other, and the conversation flowed so easily with such ease and excitement all at once.
I could feel it when he’d enter a space, even if I had my back turned. I’d hear him laugh in the same way and at the same time as me from a different room. He felt so much a part of me even though we had just met. There were so many little moments that the universe created to bring us together. It was jarring.
I had one day off in the middle of the retreat where I went back home to my karmic partner. When I got home, I had some time alone, and I broke down. I was really shaken by how moved I felt by this connection. I had learned about twin flames not too long before this experience, and I believe the purpose of having met this person who told me about her journey with her twin was for my mind to be open to the concept.
I didn’t know whether to fully believe her story, but she told it with such authenticity. I was going back and forth in my mind asking myself “Is that what this is? Or am I self-sabotaging because I’m not happy with my current relationship?”
The universe showed up in so many ways through symbols and synchronicities that it kept confirming that this was my twin flame. It was impossible to ignore.
The second week back at the retreat was unbelievable. Through the nature of the work we were doing being of such a vulnerable kind, we all showed up in such open and authentic ways. It was magical to be with a group of people who all kind of operated on the same vibrational energies even though each person was so unique.
It was such a magical place to meet my twin. Any time he and I had an interaction, he felt more and more familiar to me, and he honestly felt at home. I never had a feeling of home before because I have moved around so much.
On the last night of the retreat, it was a full moon (I can’t even make this up!). There were supposed to be a few of us staying the last night after our last day of training and supper to follow. But an emergency came up with one of the members, which then meant a whole carpool had to leave with that vehicle.
It was only my twin and I who were to stay that last night. (Again, can’t make this up!) We ended the night in the hot tub, we were talking and moon gazing, and it didn’t feel like there was any pressure of romance in a way that made things feel awkward, but the connection was just so strong I felt my whole body vibrating.
There was a lull in the conversation, and everything inside of me was telling me to ask him if he was experiencing the same thing. Even though (neither of us) was in a place to explore anything romantically. He was also in a somewhat similar situation as me, but he was actually married, and they had been separated for some time. But I had to say something because I knew I’d regret it. He lives in the US, and I live in Canada. And we wouldn’t be seeing each other until the following summer.
It was really out of character for me to be so direct and forthcoming, but I asked him, with my heart ready to burst out of my chest “Do you feel a connection with me?” And he said yes.
And we talked about what we each had been experiencing. And it was so beautiful. I will never forget it. He asked if he could sit next to me and hold my hand, and I said “You feel electric.” He said “So do you.” We both said, “I’ve never met anyone like you before”. We sat in silence for some time and looked at the full moon and said goodnight.
When he left the next morning, we took a picture together and exchanged numbers. When he drove away, a white butterfly followed his car out of the driveway. White butterflies became a huge confirmation moving forward. I would think of him, and a white butterfly would appear or come to me and land on me. I could not ignore this divine intervention.
I told my karmic about my twin the next day after having a clear conversation about all the problems he and I had. He was very receptive, but I knew that it would not be a feeling that would go away. We even tried to take a trip to repair our relationship, and it turned out to be a very traumatizing experience that I could not come back from.
I ended up going away to visit family later that week when we got back from our trip because I seriously needed space. I was flying out to see family the night of the next full moon since the retreat, and my twin messaged me saying he was chasing the full moon looking for me. We hadn’t had any contact since the retreat.
We eased into the conversation and had a couple of phone calls before the idea was brought up for me to make a layover stop the next time I was to visit family in the US. I had been trying to end things with my karmic, but the situation was very difficult.
I ended up seeing my twin for a weekend, and that confirmed that even if things didn’t work out with my twin, my karmic could never compare to this meaningfully divine connection. That my karmic was such a distraction from my mission here.
Since that breakup, I have felt such a sense of stepping into my divine power. It has not been easy, I definitely stirred the pot, but it has felt so divinely supported that any sense of catastrophe remained subsided.
People in my life have expressed admiration for my strength in making the difficult decision to leave my karmic, but I didn’t even feel like I had a choice. The universe was speaking so loudly to me. I knew that this was just part of my journey.
My twin and I have been maintaining a long-distance relationship, and it’s honestly been so beautiful and healing. Although the distance feels more difficult the more we bond, I feel it really has been the healthiest way to go through the dreaded separation stages.
Because the only reason for the separation has been due to physical distance. And it has been so essential for each of us to work on our own personal journeys and to heal individually. There is also the excitement of planning the visits, the travel.
We’ve been seeing each other about every 4-6 weeks. With the exception of one 2.5-month stretch, which felt so painful to be away from each other for that long but simultaneously so rewarding that we are able to let that become a strength of ours. He’s coming to see me and meet my family and friends next month, and it feels surreal.
Almost like he’s been this figment of my imagination that is going to come to life in my circle of people! We’ve been happily existing in our own little bubble, so that will be a very interesting shift.
Our goals and dreams are so aligned – it really feels like we are here to support each other in our missions. It’s been almost a year since we met, and I am so grateful. It has changed my perspective on life in so many ways. I feel so at peace just knowing him and having him be a part of my life and just feeling the existence of this connection.
I feel like it helps that we have each done so much personal development on our own, even before meeting each other. But we have also helped each other grow so much. Any challenging conversations we have had have always been held in a safe and respectful way.
He asks me questions that really make me reflect on parts of myself I wouldn’t think to. I used to feel the need to control myself so much, and I had an anxious attachment style, but I have never felt so secure and such unconditional love for another soul. I have such trust and faith in this connection always existing, and it brings me so much peace, joy and gratitude.
This summer feels like it is coming full circle as we will have our final retreat. It feels like union is on our horizon, and I feel like we’re meant to create love on earth and share it with others in our communities. To work and create together. I feel like we are going to get a taste of that with this cohort we’ve been training with (they’re only recently learning that we’ve become partners!)
If I could give any piece of advice to anyone reading this, it is to really follow your intuition. No matter how terrifyingly grand it may seem. No matter if other people don’t understand. You know your inner voice best. Your higher self speaking to you. Listen to the universe and trust that you are absolutely, truly divinely guided.
You can find more stories like this (and share your own) in our Twin Flame Collective Pro forum.